Memoirs

yesterday i was so depressed, thinking about L and the reason why he sent me that email one year later, i wanted to call him, i know his number by heart, i deleted him from my life and computer but i don't have a delete button to my mind. i wanted to call him so badly...but i didn't. i called my friend instead and i told her what was in my heart and after that i got an epiphany... lol... for real. i remembered something she told me like 3 months after we broke up. she told me ... i talked to him and he told me he never loved u,  that u were only an internet stuff that went too far and also that he could have u back if he wanted to.... so at that very moment i realised why he sent me the email. he knows me and he knows i was very mad with him and that i wouldn't talk to him for a very long time...but .... he thought that if i had to live one year away from him i was gonna miss him so much that i would run back as soon as he said hello.... well u know what mr. L??? u're wrong....

i can't believe this... i've just talked to SW!!!!!!!!!!! for real.... omg i talked to my pearl... it was not planned at all and i really think it won't happen again in a long time. i have this feeling he doesn't wanna to keep in touch. he said he will be here on monday but i don't think he will. he's fine but not happy at all. what a shame right...he was not that bad while he was away from home...missing a woman but pretty happy with everything else... we used to chat for hours, voice chat... i could hear everything, even his burps...lol... for real. it was funny...we used to exchange music and our thoughts. im sure he has a good reason for this absence, im sure....